Persistence: MDUUC Call to Worship for February 24, 2019

Journalist Norah O'Donnell said:

Persistence is incredibly important. Persistence proves to the person you're trying to reach that you're passionate about something, that you really want something. 

I recall that as a child, I could be annoyingly persistent about some things.  My parents had a way of dealing with this, of course.  “Just ignore it, and maybe they will get tired of it or forget about it.”  This didn’t work for everything.   I did finally get that bicycle, after a few years!

As adults, we may have somewhat loftier goals than that bicycle.

Rabbi Tarfon said:

Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world's grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.

Persistence in doing what is needed is important.  I feel that I need to be mindful of the scope of the work, and what my capacity may be. It is not OK for me to push myself to exhaustion.  While some may treat that exhaustion as a status symbol, I find that this is not a great idea, as it may lead to despair and abandoning the work I attempted.

It is OK to rest, to take a break.  Doing this before we are exhausted means that when rested, strength renewed, we may go forward with our works once more, rather than abandon them from exhaustion.  While others may hope that “maybe they will get tired of it or forget about it”, we know that we will soon return, much to their despair!

Even as we rest, recover, and gain strength from each other here, today, we may consider how we shall further our works as we worship together.

Michelle’s Oatmeal Raisin Cookies

1 c butter 2 sticks

1 c white sugar 210 g

1 c packed brown sugar 200 g

2 eggs

1tsp vanilla extract

3 tbsp blackstrap molasses 

2 c all-purpose flour 250 g

1 tsp baking soda 2 tsp calcium carbonate baking soda (salt free)

1 tsp salt Optional for salt-free

1 1/2 tsp cinnamon

2/3 tsp nutmeg

1/2 tsp allspice

1/2 tsp ground cloves

3 c rolled oats 270 g

1/4 c milk

1 1/2 c raisins

In a medium bowl, cream together butter, white sugar, and brown sugar. Beat in eggs one at a time, then stir in vanilla and molasses. Combine flour, baking soda, salt, cinnamon and other spices; stir into the creamed mixture. Mix in oats, and finally the milk and raisins. Cover, and chill dough for at least one hour.

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F  Grease cookie sheets or use parchment paper. Roll the dough into walnut sized balls, and place 3 inches apart on cookie sheets. 

Bake for 10 minutes in preheated oven. Allow cookies to cool on baking sheet for 5 minutes before transferring to a wire rack to cool completely.

Michelle’s Ultimate Chocolate Chip Cookies

1 c butter, softened 2 sticks

1/2 c white sugar 100 g

1 1/2 c packed brown sugar 310 g

3 eggs

1 tbsp vanilla extract

1 tbsp blackstrap molasses

3 c all-purpose flour 375 g

1 tsp baking soda OR 2 tsp calcium carbonate - baking grade

1/2 tsp salt (optional)

1 tsp ground cinnamon

2/3 tsp nutmeg

1/2 tsp allspice

1/2 tsp ground cloves

1/2 tsp ginger

2 c semisweet chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

Cream together the butter, white sugar, and brown sugar until smooth. Beat in the eggs one at a time, then stir in the vanilla and molasses. Add baking soda to batter along with salt if needed. Add in the spices; cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice, ground cloves, and ginger.  Stir in flour, then chocolate chips. Drop by large spoonfuls onto ungreased pans.

        Bake for about 10-12 minutes in the preheated oven, or until edges are nicely browned.

Deep Dish Pizza

I’ve built this pie in a big deep dish pan, and a variation split between a 6” and 12” cast iron skillet with different toppings, with very good results.  The recipe is quite forgiving.

INGREDIENTS

CRUST

4 cups unbleached all-purpose flour

3 tablespoons yellow cornmeal

1 1/2 teaspoons salt

2 teaspoons or one packet of yeast

4 tablespoons olive oil

4 tablespoons butter, melted

1 cup plus 2 tablespoons lukewarm water

1 teaspoon sugar

FILLING

3/4 lb. mozzarella cheese, sliced

1 pound Italian sweet or hot sausage, cooked and sliced; 

OR 3 cups of the sautéed vegetables of your choice

OR just mix them up, about 3 cups of filling total

28-ounce can plum tomatoes, lightly crushed; or 28-ounce can diced or chopped tomatoes, drained  (Add one 5.3 oz can of tomato paste for a more American-style sauce).

2 to 4 garlic cloves, peeled and minced

1 tablespoon sugar (Leave out for a more tart sauce)

1 to 2 teaspoons mixed dried Italian herbs (oregano, basil, rosemary), to taste, crushed

1 cup freshly grated Parmesan or Asiago cheese

2 tablespoons olive oil, to drizzle on top

INSTRUCTIONS

Making the crust: 

Pour the lukewarm water and one teaspoon sugar into a mixing bowl, and add yeast.  Wait for the yeast to ‘proof’, or start foaming; 5-15 minutes

Mix the dough ingredients, and knead to make a smooth crust. This takes 5-7 minutes in my KitchenAid with dough hook on low speed.

Place the dough in a lightly oiled bowl, cover, and let rise until it comes close to doubling, about 60 minutes.

While the dough is rising, ready a 14" deep-dish pizza pan or large cast-iron skillet.  Pour in 3 to 4 tablespoons olive oil, tilting it to cover the bottom of the pan, and up the sides.

Stretch the dough to make as large a circle as you can, larger than your pan.  I do this by hand rather than with a rolling pin, as I like the uneven  character of the hand-stretched dough.

Lay the dough in the pan, and stretch it towards and up the edges till it starts to shrink back.  You may have to pinch it along the top to avoid shrinking back if in a shallow pan.  Cover to rest for 15 minutes. Start preheating the oven to 425°F while the dough rests.

Bake the crust for 10 minutes, until. 

While the crust is baking, prepare the filling.

Drain the tomatoes thoroughly. Combine them with the Italian seasoning or herbs, the garlic and sugar.  Add salt to taste. Add one 5.3 oz can of tomato paste if a more ‘American’ style sauce is desired.

Remove the crust from the oven after 10 minutes, when set and just starting to brown.

Cover the bottom of the crust with the sliced mozzarella, fanning it into the crust. Add the sausage, sautéed vegetables, or other ‘toppings’.  

Spoon in the tomato mixture.

Top with the Parmesan cheese.  

As a variation, or for cheese lovers, top with another several ounces of mozzarella cheese, and even more sausage, pepperoni, or mushrooms.

Drizzle another 2-4 tablespoons of olive oil on top.

Bake the pizza for about 25 minutes, or until the filling is bubbly and the topping is golden brown. 

Remove it from the oven, and carefully lift it out of the pan onto a rack. Allow the pizza to cool for about 15 minutes before cutting and serving.  The internal temperature will continue to rise even as the pie cools.  There will be less runny cheese oozing out when the pie is allowed to rest and cool

Yield: about 8 huge or 12 reasonable slices

Thoughts On Privilege

Thoughts on Privilege

Michelle Paquette

The “white privilege” phrase touches on fragility in some folks, so I have been dodging it a bit to engage others in conversations on culture and privilege.  The underlying issue has a broader impact than just race, unfortunately.  Cultural racial biases are just one of the more obvious symptoms.

Western European Colonialism has a long history of what we now see as a fairly offensive behavior, starting with the sending of expeditions to take ‘new’ lands from the peoples and civilizations that had long lived there.  Well established and thriving cultures which had practices different from those that the Western European theocracy thought proper were ‘corrected’, and the ‘savages’ were taught proper Western European values, from religious practices to cultural imperatives.  Concepts such as indentured servitude and slavery were introduced or if present, modified, putting the Western European colonizers at the top of the social structure and the indigenous people at the bottom. The culture was such that this was seen as beneficial to the indigenous peoples, that the “little brown people” (a phrase from the literature of the time!) were somehow being “saved” by these practices.

Many of the assumptions and practices of this culture persist to this day, granting greater privilege to the descendants of those Western Europeans, and still putting the descendants of the slaves, the servants and the indigenous peoples lower on the pecking order.

When we talk of privilege, we are not speaking of a magical superpower, or something that makes one feel special.  The privilege we have is something we have swam in our whole life, and just as a fish does not see the water, we do not see our privilege, until we can compare it with the privilege another has.

When I walk down the street, I tend to be a bit nervous, apprehensive.  I worry about some strange man straight-arming me.  I know there are shops I am not permitted in.  This is my level of privilege.

I also can look at others.  Men who walk down the street, a big stride, arms swinging wide.  They can enter shops that I cannot.  I am expected to step out of their path, and if I fail to do so, they will walk straight up to me, stop just short of me, and blink as if startled that I am in their way.  They may say ‘Excuse me’, before they step past.  They have more privilege than I do.

They do not realize that they have this privilege, of course.  They are swimming in it.

The work we are engaged in involves looking within, recognizing the privilege each of us holds, and recognizing when we exert that privilege in ways that may cause harm to another.  My goal is to help bring about a world in which all enjoy privilege consistent with the worth and dignity of every human being.

How Can I Learn If You Won’t Teach Me?

How Can I Learn If You Won’t Teach Me?

Michelle Paquette

In recent conversations, I was exposed yet again to persons of privilege indicating that it was the responsibility of marginalized persons to teach them.  While marginalized persons may have the knowledge or experience that a person of privilege wants to gain, it really is not their responsibility to serve as tutor.  Learning is the responsibility of the person of privilege, and transferring that responsibility to the marginalized persons is an act of privilege.

Now, a marginalized person may very well understand their experience and the issues that they face.  They are engaged with these issues on a daily basis, and yearn for the time when persons of privilege will listen and take in their experience.  That ask by a person of privilege tugs at their yearning, their hope that others will listen, learn, and improve the social environment.  That ask can produce a sense of gratitude, that some privileged person actually values them in some way.

That ask also serves to reinforce the hierarchy between persons of privilege and the marginalized person, however.  Rather than use the hundreds or thousands of resources available on the subject available to the privileged person, whether via the internet, the book store, the library, or professional training and classes, the marginalized person is expected to perform on demand.  That, after all, is their place as an inferior, to accede to one’s demands as a person of privilege.

By insisting that they can only learn if the marginalized person right then and there sacrifices further hours of time going over the ground that they have covered so often in the past, the person of privilege can successfully make the marginalized person question themselves, and the value that sharing their knowledge and experience brings to the table.  With repetition, this experience may succeed in driving the marginalized person away altogether.  

With this transfer of responsibility for education to the marginalized person, the person of privilege communicates that they would very much like to learn, but if the marginalized person fails to respond and educate on demand they are responsible for holding the person of privilege back, preventing them from becoming properly compassionate, understanding, and better connected.  It becomes not the fault of the person of privilege, but blame is dropped squarely on the marginalized person for failing to grant them the boon of education.

This demand, then, becomes another act of privilege, reminding the marginalized person of their lesser privilege, putting them in their place yet again.

Now, as a marginalized person I do care about these issues, and am willing to educate others.  My willingness does not make the education of others my responsibility, however.  Persons who would like me to provide them with information, education, or knowledge need to make a little effort, and show up at a time and place where I am prepared and willing to do this work for them.

It is not my responsibility to educate others.  It is their responsibility to learn, to do the work, engage in even the most basic efforts.  Buy the book, read the article, listen to the recording, watch the video.  Show up for the class.  It is not my responsibility to digest the material and spoon-feed it to others on demand.  

Even marginalized persons have other demands on their lives, other obligations beyond being at the beck and call of privileged persons.  Even marginalized persons have work to do, classes to attend, family to care for.  Privilege does not grant a greater priority on the time of a marginalized person than their own needs demand.

Persons of privilege are not entitled to monopolize the time and energy of marginalized persons merely to sate their own curiosity.  There are other resources available, at very modest effort.  Google it, for goodness sakes!  Read a book.  There are plenty of resources with the information desired already distilled into bits easily swallowed.

If a marginalized person should point out that some behavior is offensive, recognize that they are not taking on the obligation to correct that behavior.  That is the task and responsibility of the offender, to gracefully accept the indication, and do the work to verify and correct that behavior as needed.

If a marginalized person sets aside time to educate others, as a class nor presentation for example, any person of privilege with interest should make the effort to attend.  The marginalized person is offering a gift.  Never assume that the marginalized person will be willing to repeat their class or presentation one-on-one with a person of privilege who failed to attend.  That, once again, is merely an exercise in privilege and serves to put the marginalized person in their place as a person of lesser privilege.

My conversations with people of privilege often feel like I am repeatedly pounding my head against a brick wall.  Oh, sure, if I do it long enough, perhaps I will leave a mark, but it certainly is not comfortable.  And honestly, there are times when I would like to take a break, just enjoy a nice cup of coffee and perhaps some chocolate cake, without having to slam my head into the wall again.

There is no need to remind me that if I only cared about my issues, I should be willing to step up and slam my head into that wall again, surely a small price to pay for a better world!  Unless,of course, the real goal is to slam me down yet again, in the hope that I will go away and stop making the privileged feel slightly uncomfortable.

Are persons of privilege willing to step up, and take responsibility for their own education?

Rite of Passage: The Mammogram at Kaiser...

It’s a rite of passage. 

I am sitting in a medical building on a Saturday morning awaiting my first mammogram.   I’m all nerves and “what-ifs”.   We shall see.

Here we go. 

...

Ow. 

Four images, vertical and at 45 degrees. A fairly hard pinch after considerable tugging by the tech. But, it’s done. 

I wasn’t lectured on not doing this earlier. I wasn’t misgendered. Nobody even mentioned my trans origins. I was just another woman.   That was nice, actually. 

Good images, according to the tech. Now they go to the radiologist. 

...

Kaiser just called.

The radiologist wants me at their mammography center over in Martinez, for further imaging and possible ultrasound on my left breast.

I’m hoping that my issue is just dense tissue.  The left side is less developed.  Let’s face it, Tanner Stage 2-3 mammaries on a 65 year old is sort of odd.

...

Tuesday night...  The Kaiser automated reminder system reminded me I have an appointment tomorrow.  Yeah.  I’m aware of it.  It takes me a while to finally get to sleep.

...

Wednesday morning, already?  I didn’t sleep all that well.  It’s 5:30AM, and I was planning on getting up a little after 6.  Ah, well.  Might as well get up now.  

I start my oatmeal to simmering, then take a quick shower and get dressed.  No deodorant or powders, per the Kaiser message’s instructions.  I brew my coffee, just one cup for now, and collect my oatmeal.  Breakfast...

I catch up on my mail and messages, and peek at the news while eating.  No new disasters out in the world to distract me, so I finish up and get my stuff together.  Out to the car, and off to Martinez...

I arrive at the Kaiser campus and park.  Yes, campus, with a hospital, and a number of outbuildings.  I want the Hacienda building.  There are signs and maps, and I eventually find the building.  They even have good signage inside the buildings.  I follow the arrows with the pink ribbon markers to the Mammography Clinic, and queue up, about 20 minutes early.

Pay the copay.  Collect one gown, and head to the Female Patient Lounge.  Yes, that is the sign by the door!  There is a waiting room with seats and sofas of the Kaiser sort, and a set of dressing rooms in back.  I’m shown to one, and swap top and bra for the usual breezy exam gown, bag my own clothing, and head to the waiting room.

After a few minutes a tech finds me, and brings me to an imaging room, where once again I face the Hologic boob smasher.   Three images are taken.

The first image this time is horizontal.  The second is another 45 degree shot, at right angles to the one done last Saturday.  The third is another 45 degree shot, with a special extra-squeezy plate loaded in the machine.

Ow.

Ok, the images look good, so they go off to the radiologist, and I go back to the waiting room.

After about 20 minutes, which I occupy with getting a cup of coffee and doing a little reading, another person summons me to the door, and then takes me aside and starts whispering to me.  Uh oh....

Calm... calm... listen to the words. OK, there is a little problem (Hey!  Blood pressure spikes!).  The radiologist wants to follow up with an ultrasound.  (Oh, that sort of problem.)  They can make an ‘appointment’ for an immediate scan and followup with the radiologist, but there will be an additional copay.  (Oh, is THAT all?)

So, I go to the admitting desk in the clinic, pay the ticket, and head back to the waiting room.  The appointment is in 15 minutes.  No big deal.

The ultrasound tech finds me, and escorts me to the Ultrasound Room.  I get to pop the top, and lie on my back, one arm behind my head.  Gel and probe time.

Goddess be praised!  They actually warmed the gel and probe!  I lie back and think of England.  Why can’t they make a decent steak?  And what’s with Manchester United, anyway?

The tech says she has good images, and they are off to the radiologist, who will be there in a few minutes.  I get to rest on the table, with a warmed, soft towel over my breasts.  (I am starting to think women were involved in equipping and procedural planning for this facility.)

Another young woman knocks and enters.  This is my radiologist!  She decides to look at a few spots, so I get a little more warm gel applied, and spend a few minutes holding still.   Mmmmm... Hmmmm...  OK.  No problems.

I have a little dense tissue that made imaging tricky, and since they had no baseline in the Kaiser records, they wanted to be very sure about whether or not there was a problem.  Next time should be much easier as they will be able to check for changes against the baseline.

So, clean checkup, just the common dense breast tissue.